Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Black Tuesday Or How Miami Exploded

Hello Mystery fans! It has been quite awhile. We do apologize for the lack of blogs, but we have so much scouting, phone calls, and never ending sobbing to endure this time of year.

Speaking of soul-crushing misfortunes, the Miami Marlins have decide to go all Wiley Coyote on themselves. Quick, think of a Miami Marlin. Do you have one in mind? Well, you are wrong. The player you are thinking of is now a Toronto Blue Jay as ESPN has reported this evening.

Mystery Team will continue to make calls to the Miami Marlins. Our current offer of some dinner chocolates we took from an Olive Garden and a box of old Florida Marlins hats for Giancarlo Stanton and Logan Morrison has yet to be accepted. Hopefully a trade to us won't "piss off" Mr. Stanton.

We want to take time to promise every Mystery fan that we will not trade away any of the cornerstone players that we may or may not have. We value your continued support and with that clearly have a better chance of getting a new stadium before the A's ever do. To be fair, they do have THIS going on for them.

Remember to follow us here on our blog, on the bookface, and in the twitterverse. If it is news to you, it is news to us. Always be a fan.

-Mystery Front Office
(Not Yet Sold to Disney)

Sunday, July 29, 2012

Brandon League

Once again Mystery fans, the MLB trade deadline is like Christmas to us here at Mystery Team. ESPN's Jerry Crasnick reports that Mariners reliever Brandon League is being traded to an undisclosed location. Whilst Alaska, France, the South Pacific are all possibilities, we'd like to think we are close on trading for this mysterious reliever.

Not to be outdone by baseless speculation, MLB.com's Alden Gonzalez reports that it is in fact San Francisco or Anaheim obtaining the reliever. As you all know from the past...we here at Mystery Team always assume California will acquire everyone.

The Mystery Front Office will continue it's best to outbid The State of California, possibly Chicago , and anywhere else who thinks they have a shot for Mr. League. You hear us Mars? Yes, we will go intergalatic if need be.

Keep in mind, if it is news to you, it is a Mystery to us. Keep your eyes on this blog, like us on the Facebook, stalk us on Twitter, and always be a fan.

-Mystery Front Office

Friday, July 27, 2012

Zack Greinke Trade

Dear Mystery Fans,

We humbly apologize for not acquiring the services of social anxiety victim and ace extraordinaire Zachary Clarence Greinke (He just looks like a Clarence). There are still several ace and aceish pitchers available such as "Big Game" James Shields (We assume Shoots & Ladders) and possibly Josh Johnson.

Now, not securing Greinke does not mean all is lost. Now with the YMCA League equivalent of Wild Card spots, we should be able to secure something. There is no truth to the rumors of us going full fire sale mode like the Miami Marlins of Ft. Lauderdale.

We would like to congratulate the Anaheim Angles of California of Orange County of the Western United States on their acquisition. We have also just learned whilst sending this blog out that Marco Scutaro has been acquired by the San Francisco Giants. California, please stop monopolizing our trades.

Until next time Mystery fans, if it's news to you...it's a Mystery to us. Make sure to follow our front office ramblings on this blog, on BookFace, and in the Twitters.

-Mystery Front Office

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Brian Fuentes

It's that time of the summer again Mystery fan. You know the usual; fireworks, trips, the A's selling any piece of value they possibly have to the highest bidders. It is a wonderful time in Americana.

The Mystery Front Office is contacting Billy Beane non-stop in hopes of landing a role as him or valuable trade commodities. Such stellar pieces include Brain Fuentes according to Jon Heyman. How can we overlook such a valuable bullpen pieces. What, with an era close to 7 and losing the closer role to a guy who never actually closed, how could any team pass that up?

More and more opportunities will be coming through the pipeline of tradedom as we head into the heart of the Summer. We here at the Mystery Team Front Office will stay on top of all possible trade avenues and will continue to do our best in badgering, we mean dealing with other MLB GMs.

The Mystery Front Office reminds you to have a safe Summer and always be a fan. Just remember if it is news to you, it's a Mystery to us. Like us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter, subscribe to us on Youtube (wait, we don't have that....yet), and keep checking this very same blog for all Mystery information.

-Mystery Front Office

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Jorge Soler

Greetings Mystery Fans! They do say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, and we do apologize for the lack of updates recently. However, with the trade deadline vastly approaching, only more Mystery news can be on the way. Be rest assured that when not posting to this blog, the Mystery front office is diligently at work scouring the globe for the best available talents.

Such a talent has emerged in the form of Cuban defector, Jorge Soler. Many in the baseball world have been awaiting his eligibility as the last big name international signing before the new MLB collective bargaining agreement takes place.

As we have learned apparently from multiple outlets such as the Chicago Sun-Times, several teams vie for this international superstar. While destinations like Chicago, New York, or LA seems likely, we here at Mystery Team never fall asleep at the wheel. Be rest assured ever effort to pop in a bid via phone, text, eBay, carrier pigeon, and smoke signals were made. Judging by this birth certificate written in crayon we can only assume this "19-year-old" will be a prominent outfielder for years to come.

Once again, be sure to check this blog, our Facebook page, and our Twitter account for all the latest in any Mystery news, signings, merchandising, rants, and/or restraining orders. If it's news to you, it's a Mystery to us. Always be a fan.

-Mystery Team Front Office

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Opening Day


Opening Day for all MLB clubs has now come and gone.  As you can see our field was prepped and readied for another rousing year of baseball. MYSTERY TEAM hopes to have a successful 2012 campaign filled with acquisitions and moves to shock and awe the baseball universe.

So Mystery fans, keep up with our blog, Facebook, and Twitter for all the seasons hottest MYSTERY TEAM information.

-Mystery Front Office

Friday, March 2, 2012

MLB Expands Playoffs

Greetings Mystery fans! In news that has swept the baseball world at its core, Major League Baseball has announced that it will expand their playoffs to a ten team format. This essentially adds a Wild Card round and by essentially, it's because it does.

The two Wild Card teams will battle to the death in the Roman time honored tradition of playing a one and done. Meaning no best of 3, 5, 7, or the lethal 162. The winner of Wild Card round will go on to play the number one seed in the divisional round.

Some baseball purists may be outraged at this development. Is MLB diluting their playoff pool? We here at MYSTERY TEAM are firmly in support of this. Another slot adds great opportunity. Finally MYSTERY TEAM has a legit chance year in and year out of taking part of the playoffs instead of golfing in October. While the Mystery front office is full of golfers of Tiger Woodian proportions, the truth is everyone involved would rather ruffle the sheets of the big dance.

Fear not though Mystery fans, just because there is an added Wild Card team does not mean that is the Mystery Modus Operandi. Being the best team in our league will ensure we get to take on a weakened Wild Card team. Which league will we stand atop of this year? If it is a Mystery to you...it is a Mystery to us. Always be a fan.

-Mystery Front Office

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

AJ Burnett

Breaking news has come across the GM desk here at MYSTERY TEAM. News being reported by MLB Trade Rumor's Tim Dierkes by way of the Magellan Strait via FOX Sports Ken Rosenthal.

Rosenthal has reported that there is an impasse between the Yankees and Pirates on a possible AJ Burnett deal. That isn't really the biggest news however. MYSTERY TEAM has once again been thrown in as another amber stoking that sweet sweet trade rumor fire.

Rosenthal reported that a fourth unknown team had lukewarm interest in Mr. Burnett, to which Dierkes listed as MYSTERY TEAM.

We want to be very forthright with these allegations. Unless the New York Yankees paid us double AJ's salary, there is no way we'd have any interest. There is one large detriment to any and all trade talks between us: WE HAVE SEEN HIM PITCH!

Due to the lack of competition between the Pirates and Yankees, also plausibly the lack of YES network coverage in Pittsburgh, we cannot be certain the Pirates have ever seen AJ pitch in past few years.

What was a once promising ace is now just a pie throwing, Dennis the Menace looking chap who has possibly the best stuff in the league but the accuracy and grace of a bird flying into a glass door.

So while MYSTERY TEAM wishes AJ Burnett the best in his endeavors, we must put to rest any interest we have on the 2009 World Series Winner and 2003 Guy Who Got a Ring.

Remember to always check this blog, our twitter, or facebook page first when trying to verify a MYSTERY TEAM rumor. Because if it's a mystery to you, it's a mystery to us. Always be a fan.

--Mystery Front Office

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Yoenis Cespedes

There's an air hovering over the MLB right now.  An air of Mystery, and for once it's not all about the MYSTERY TEAM.

Yoenis Cespedes has arrived with more bags of mystery then MYSTERY TEAM brings on team flights. All the footage we have of this five tool talent is a YouTube video. Will his talent translate into the big leagues?  Is Cespedes the next Ken Griffey Jr? Can anyone spell Yoenis Cespedes without googling it first?  So many questions surround this great player.

Our scouts say all signs point to maybe on his big league potential.  That's all we ever needed to hear in the MYSTERY TEAM front office. Despite the fact ESPN.com's Jayson Stark reporting Cespedes met with the Marlins this week, we're going all-in on this prospect and hope to turn the corner into World Series favorites. We think even at this juncture the MYSTERY TEAM out draws the Fish and is a more appealing destination. ¡Viva MYSTERY TEAM!

-Mystery Front Office

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Detroit Tigers Sign Prince Fielder

Well, we are at it again according to Jon Heyman of CBS Sports. Heyman suggests that we have won again, which we appreciate. According to writers like him, we are clearly having a stellar off-season. We did want to set the record straight.

Despite Heyman's claims that Prince Fielder went to the MYSTERY TEAM in this instance, he is sadly mistaken. As previously denoted, we would have loved to add Mr. Fielder's son to our team. However, it was not in the cards. The Detroit Tigers are a wonderfully run organization and are the team who have engineered this signing. We wish Mr. Fielder the best of luck at Comerica's Park and fine dinning establishments.

Also to add further clarifications to the article, we never signed Cliff Lee or Albert Pujols. Not that we didn't try, because indeed the MYSTERY TEAM tried. We hope to have future signings announced here on our team blog, team twitter, or team facebook.

-Mystery Front Office

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Bartolo Colon

It has been quite a couple of days. Yankees GM Brian Cashman showed up once again to swoop in and make the kind of deals that he is known for. The kind of deals that are usually speculated upon first with the MYSTERY TEAM in mind.

The deals keep coming though. Bob Nightengale of USA Today twittered...tweeted...that Bartolo Colon has signed with unknown team. Now as we all know if it's unknown it is then a mystery. I would like to dispel any rumors that Mr. Colon signed with MYSTERY TEAM.

So now that we have confirmation that Bartolo Colon did not sign with MYSTERY TEAM, it should be concluded that the team he did in fact sign with is a known team. We hope Mr. Colon has a successful physical and the known team can become known to all shortly.

We here at MYSTERY TEAM still want our fan base to know that we will continue working diligently on securing the type of talent that you have come to know and love. Keep up on all the league goings on and always be a fan.

-Mystery Front Office

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Prince Fielder

It has come to our attention that Shannon Drayer of 710 ESPN Seattle has reported several unnamed teams are interested in the Prince of baseball (Source). Now this does stipulate most of these nameless teams are in the National League.

While it is widely known that the MYSTERY TEAM may or may not reside in the National League, our comments on the matter were not disseminated to Drayer. However, due to our inability to sign King Albert, certainly one would ascertain that we should seek some sort of royalty on our team.

Prince Fielder will remain a coveted prize to any team in need of a boost in power and a solid first baseman. We here at MYSTERY TEAM can only hope for further baseless speculation from reporters on alleged interest that Scott Boras or "not Scott Boras" tells them.

The Mystery front office thanks you for your continued support and we hope to add additions in the future. Keep checking with us on this blog, like us on Facebook, and follow us on the Twitter.

-Mystery Front Office

Monday, January 2, 2012

Coco Crisp

The New Year has truly rung in with Jon Heyman of CBS sports reporting our alleged interest in free-agent outfielder Coco Crisp (http://jon-heyman.blogs.cbssports.com/mcc/blogs/entry/33714192/34168175).

Mr. Heyman notes the Orioles may be a strong candidate in the Crisp sweepstakes as well as a plausibility in the Cards and Cubs, but who is the very first team Mr. Heyman denotes? Clearly there are leaks in the MYSTERY TEAM front office to let such matters be made public to Mr. Heyman.

However as the most active and prolific front office in Major League Baseball, MYSTERY TEAM understood it was only a matter of time before our team was linked to another free-agent to kick off the new year.

We hope Mr. Crisp makes a swift and just choice in his team selection. Be rest assured Mystery fans that we will be awaiting diligently by our phones if this outfield commodity chooses to return our call.

-Mystery Front Office